Our Advice Centre is open today from 10:00am – 5:00pm
Practicing Safe Sex
Helping you to make informed, confident and safe choices about sex and relationships
What is safe sex?
Safe sex means taking steps to protect yourself and other people during any kind of sexual activity. It includes using contraception like the pill to prevent unwanted pregnancies and condoms to reduce the risk of sexually transmitted infections (STIs).
But it’s not just about physical protection. It’s also about making sure that everyone involved feels safe, respected and comfortable. This means communicating clearly, being honest about your boundaries and only doing what you’re both happy with.
Safe sex applies to all types of sexual activity. It also involves understanding consent, being emotionally ready and having the information you need to make responsible choices.
Why safe sex matters
Preventing STIs
STIs like chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, herpes and HIV can be passed from one person to another during unprotected sex. Many STIs don’t have symptoms, so the only way to know if you have one it to get tested.
Avoiding unplanned pregnancy
If you’re having vaginal sex and don’t want to become pregnant or cause a pregnancy, using contraception is essential. There are many types available and it’s about finding out what works for you.
Protecting your emotional wellbeing
Being sexually active can have emotional effects. It’s important to make sure you’re ready and feel good about your decision, rather than feeling pressured or unsure.
Building healthy relationships
Respecting each other’s boundaries, discussing contraception and protection and making joint decisions about sex can help you to build a strong and healthy relationship with the person you’re seeing.
Consent: Knowing your rights and responsibilities
Consent means agreeing to do something freely and clearly. In sexual situations, consent must be mutual – everyone involved needs to give clear permission by what is called ‘enthusiastic consent’, which is when someone says ‘yes’ because they really mean it. If you engage in any sexual activity with anyone that has not given consent, this is an act of sexual violence and is a criminal offence.
Here are the key things to know about consent:
– It must be given freely, without pressure or manipulation
– You must be able to give consent – if someone is drunk, high, asleep or underage, they cannot legally consent to any activity.
– Consent can be withdrawn at any time – just because you said yes before doesn’t mean you can’t say no later.
– Consent should be enthusiastic – everyone should feel good about what’s happening.
Only ‘yes’ means yes. Silence of uncertainty is not consent.
Talking about consent may feel awkward at first, but it’s an essential part of a respectful and safe sexual relationship.
You can find out more about consent on Brook’s website.
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Protecting yourself: Contraception and STIs
Condoms are one of the most effective ways to protect against both STIs and pregnancy. They come in different sizes and types, including latex-free options. Condoms are available for free from sexual health clinics, some youth services like No Limits, and some schools.
Other forms of contraception include:
– The pill – Taken daily to prevent ovulation
– The implant – Placed under the skin, this can last for up to three years
– The injection – This lasts 8-13 weeks
– The IUD (coil) – Placed in the uterus, this can last 5-10 years
– The patch – A small skin patch that releases hormones
Each method has its pros and cons and it’s a good idea to talk to a healthcare provider about what works best for your lifestyle.
Remember, most contraceptive methods do not protect against STIs, so using a condom is still important.
Getting tested for STIs
Getting an STI test is a normal and responsible part of being sexually active. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about and most STIs can be treated easily with antibiotics or managed care. Even if you feel fine, it’s worth getting tested regularly – especially if you’ve had a new partner or have had unprotected sex.
Tests are usually quick, free and confidential. You can get tested at sexual health clinics, GP surgeries or even order home test kits online. You can find STI testing and treatment near you on the NHS website, here.
At our Advice Centre, we can offer free condoms, pregnancy tests and chlamydia screenings, as well as running a specialist sexual health clinic every week.
Healthy relationships and emotional wellbeing
Safe sex also means thinking about your emotional safety. A healthy sexual relationship should make you feel good – not anxious, pressured or confused.
Signs of a healthy relationship include:
– You feel respected and listened to
– You can talk openly about feelings and boundaries
– Decisions about sex are made together
– You feel safe saying ‘no’
Signs of an unhealthy relationship include:
– One person pressures or manipulates the other
– There’s a lack of trust or constant jealousy
– Communication is difficult or one-sided
– You feel scared, controlled or unhappy
If something doesn’t feel right, talk to someone you trust, like a family member or No Limits youth worker or another specialist organisation. There are links to help and support below.
I want to find out more
These websites have more information on safe sex and sexual health:
– Brook – Sexual health advice, contraception and clinics for under 25s – Click here
– NHS Sexual Health Services – Find local clinics and services near you – Click here
– Let’s Talk About It – Hampshire & Isle of Wight NHS’ sexual health website – Click here
I need help
– Stop Domestic Abuse – Supporting and protecting victims and survivors of domestic abuse and stalking in Hampshire – Click here
– Yellow Door – Preventing and responding to domestic and sexual abuse in Hampshire – Click here
– Refuge – For women and children against domestic violence – 24/7 free helpline on 0808 2000 247
– Respect Men’s Advice Line – Supporting men affected by domestic abuse – Phone 0808 801 0327 (Mon – Fri 10am – 5pm)